Worth Fighting For
by Skyknight1987
Summary: Kurt reflects on his relationship with Amanda in his conversations with Jean, Amanda, Rogue and Kitty as they help him battle his demons and to realize the depth of Amanda's feelings for him.That she considers him to be worth fighting for.
1. Jean

**Disclaimer: Don't own franchise. Not making any money off this.**

** ========== XxX ========== **

Kurt Wagner, the Nightcrawler, resident teleporter, fuzzy elf and self proclaimed King of Pranksters sat all by his thoughtful, lonesome self on the roof of the Institute. It was a clear night, not a cloud in the sky. The star constellations hung above the earth in all their glory, their brilliance undiminished by cloud cover. The night was slightly warm and humid and a gentle, cool breeze was blowing from the bay. All in all, ideal weather conditions.

Storm had seen to that.

Kurt took a swig out of the soda bottle that he was holding as he contemplated on his life over the past few months and the implications on his future. He was drinking more as an absent gesture, something to occupy his hand and wet his throat, than for the taste. In fact he barely noticed the taste. It was just a background sensation, like the breeze. A soothing accompaniment to his restless frame of mind. Something that registered as pleasant in some corner of his brain and contributed to a more comfortable situation, but which wasn't brought to the attention of the conscious mind which was focusing on something else. The bottle had been running low for quite a while now. Kurt was taking occasional small and leisured sips, in order to prolong the time until he would have to put the bottle down or return to get a refill.

He didn't feel like rejoining his friends just yet.

His thoughts were far away tonight.

_Amanda..._

He loved that girl. Loved her with every fiber of his being. And he knew that she loved him as well. But…

He shook his head and sighed. His mind was filled with a restlessness and uncertainty that he hadn't experienced since he came into the X-Men.

It was late. The mansion was silent and dark, with the exception of the dim lights left on at the stairwells and at scattered locations in the corridors, all the teaching staff having retired to bed a while ago. Outside in the grounds, the sensors of the mansion's automated security system continued their silent vigil.

However some distance away, near the gazebo at the edge of the cliffs, a party was in full swing. It was the night of Scott and Jean's graduation day. Their classmates were all out all over Bayville, painting the town red. However, knowing that Scott and Jean were highly unlikely to receive any party invitations after being revealed as mutants, Kurt had quietly come up with plans of their own surprise party in Scott and Jeans honor, and enlisted Rogue, Kitty and Evan the help him with the details. Party animals Kitty and Evan were only too delighted with the prospects of a full on party. Rogue predictably was noticeably less enthusiastic, but she not only agreed to help with the details but, to the others' surprise, also to actually attend the party. She even went so far as to promise to at least make a conscious effort to actually enjoy herself.

Kurt supposed that all the effort he had put in getting her to loosen up was finally having an effect. He had practically forced her to come with him to Germany for the Christmas holidays, instead of staying in the mansion with all the other students gone. He had introduced her to his parents as his sister, and he could tell that she had been surprised and touched when his mother had given her a warm, though careful, hug and told her that Kurt had told them all about her and that they looked forward to getting to know her. Away from the Institute's crowd, Rogue had noticeably relaxed and dispensed with her moody, sarcastic exterior. For the first time in as long as he had known her, Kurt saw her smile, even laugh out loud in pure mirth. It was a considerably more relaxed Rogue who returned with Kurt to the Institute at the end of the holidays, a proud possessor of a brand new photo album of her own, filled with snapshots of her with Kurt and several with his parents as well.

The party preparations hadn't been much hassle. The only problem was keeping it a secret from Jean. She did not usually make it a habit to go around snooping into people's minds, however when a person was overexcited, when they thought too 'loudly', she couldn't help overhearing them. That meant that they had to keep a lid on their emotions while they made the arrangements. They had originally intended a small get-together for just the five of them, but with the recent anti-mutant sentiments, nowhere in Bayville was safe for a celebration. The mutants could all handle trouble but Kurt did not want this party to play out under the shadow of apprehensiveness. So it was decided to hold the party within the Institute. And since they were at the Institute, there was no reason not to include the New Mutants as well. This would be the last time they would see Scott and Jean as fellow students. From here on now, they would be part of the senior staff. Besides the anti-mutant sentiments in the outside world were affecting them as well and they could all use some cheering up.

Professor Xavier was not a fan of late night parties, particularly ones that were held at the Institute. However, just this once, he relented and granted permission. The growing anti-mutant protests and open hostility were wearing down on all of them. There was little inclination to celebrate these days and precious few occasions to do so. The party would do them some good. Reintroduce some measure of normalcy, however fleeting, into their turbulent lives. Kurt overheard the professor remark to Storm later that it would be a pity to deprive them of this excellent opportunity to make a great deal of mess and noise.

The arrangements were mostly handled by Kurt. The New Mutants were informed about the party in the morning, when Scott and Jean were at school for their graduation ceremony, safely out of earshot. The next day was Saturday, and even Logan had been so generous as to cancel the Friday night and Saturday morning Danger Room sessions of the respective student batches so that the partygoers could sleep late. The muted sounds of music and laughter were audible where Kurt was sitting. It was only by his above-than-normal hearing that Kurt could make out the sounds though. A person with normal hearing wouldn't hear a thing.

Kurt thoughtfully took another sip of his soda. He had gone a lot of trouble to ensure that the part would go off like clockwork, and now, ironically, he was the only one sitting it out.

"Hey, what's up Pointy Ears?" came a familiar voice from behind him. Kurt glanced back to see a floating Jean Grey. Her cheeks were flushed from laughing and her eyes were shining with merriment. The wind blew her long red hair into her face. He smiled slightly. It was not the first time that the sight of her floating down so gracefully, with her arms outstretched at her sides, had made Kurt think of an angel descending upon the earth. Kurt hadn't seen her this happy in a long time. She and Scott had been increasingly bogged down with the pressure of their finals, along with dealing with continued persecution at school by the other students, some of whom had been their friends, in addition to their increasing responsibilities at the mansion. Just the look on their faces tonight, when the others had sprung the party on them, had made all the effort worthwhile. Evan had captured it all on tape.

"Vhat's up?" Kurt repeated in a mock thoughtful voice. "Vell, zhe sky for starters, zhe stars, you are too. Vell even I am" he added peering down over the edge of the roof. "Zhe roof of the Institute vould certainly qualify as 'up' vouldn't it?"

Jean chuckled as she floated over to him and sat down next to him. "Well, if you're so up what's got you so down?" Kurt smiled. Jean was known for her eloquence and wit, though she usually maintained a serious demeanor. But she seemed to be running a little strong tonight.

"My, my, aren't we bubbly tonight?" he teased. He hadn't seen her like this since the whole Bayville Sirens business.

"Hey, it's my night to howl." Jean replied with a toss of her head. "And I understand that I have you to thank for that." she added with a smile.

"No problem."

"So why isn't the Master of Ceremonies down there presiding over the ceremonies?"

When Kurt didn't respond Jean turned and punched his shoulder lightly. "Come on what's with the long blue face? Don't tell me you and Amanda had a fight or something."

Kurt flinched slightly. Jean sensed that she had struck a nerve and tentatively placed her hand on his shoulder. "Kurt, I'm sorry… I didn't mean to… is everything all right between you two?" she asked hesitatingly, uncharacteristically stumbling on her words, while she mentally chided herself for her loose tongue. Usually she was more perceptive than this, but tonight, wrapped in her own delight, she had been less sensitive to Kurt's frame of mind.

Kurt heard the worry in her voice and softened. It was good to know that someone cared.

"It's all right, Jean. Nothing to be vorried about." he reassured her. "Und to answer, your question, Amanda and I haven't been fighting. She's not zhe problem…" his voice trailed off.

"Hmm. You wanna talk about it?"

Kurt stared out over the ocean. He did want to talk about it with someone. Badly. It wasn't that he did not trust his Katzchen with this issue. But he was unsure what advice she could give him. What he really needed right now was someone like an older sibling. Someone who cared about him, who understood his dilemma, and who had been through something like this before him and could give him advice from their own experience. Someone solid and dependable, who could calm him down and whose advice he could trust.

And of all his fellow students at the Institute, Scott and Jean fit the bill better than anyone else.

When he had first arrived at the Institute he had been plagued by recurrent nightmares of the time when the villagers had found about him and nearly burned him at the stake. He had used his teleportation ability for the first time that day and that was all that had saved his life. At the Institute, alone in a different country, among people who were as different from what he had known, as he was to them, it had been hard to adapt. He had depended heavily on Scott and Jean during those initial weeks. Scott, to cope with the new lifestyle, inside as well as outside the mansion and Jean to deal with his uncertainty and insecurity, not to mention his nightmares. He had confessed having nightmares when she had woken him up from a particularly bad one, during his early days at the institute. She had sat with him through the night comforting him as he told her about his ordeal in a shaking voice. It had cost him every ounce of his willpower to keep talking but he felt better once he had finished, like something poisonous had been extracted out of him. She had invited him to come to her whenever he had any problems. He had gone to her several times after he had woken up in the middle of the night from some bad nightmares and she sat with him, with her arm around him, stroking his fur in a soothing gesture, working toward calming him down as they talked about his nightmare, or whatever else that was bothering him, or just things in general, depending on his mood, until he felt better. She had assumed the role of a surrogate elder sister in his life, one who he could turn to for advice, pep talks and reassurances. Eventually the nightmares stopped as he gained confidence and found a place for himself within the X-Men. But he continued to look up to her and Scott.

"Amanda and I…" he trailed off, squeezed his eyes shut, and decided to go for broke. "She is funny, und beautiful, und kind, und vonderful. She is everything zhat I dreamed of. But I just can't shake off zhe feeling zhat something is going to go wrong… zhat zis will end badly." There, it was finally out.

"And just why would you think that?" Jean asked mildly.

"Because she is funny, und beautiful, und kind, und vonderful." Kurt said in an increasingly agitated voice. "Und I hav learnt zhe hard vay zhat if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. Story of my life. I've already managed to make a bad impression on her parents, thanks to zhat fucker, Toad. And while _she _says she is not going to give up on me regardless of vhat her parents say …"

Jean shook her head in pity. The boy had some serious low self-esteem issues. Anyone would really, if they had to grow up hiding from the world. Kurt's parents had, in an effort to keep him safe, drummed into him that he must never allow himself to be seen except by the small handful of people who knew of his existence. But an unforeseen side effect of that was that Kurt had formed an assumption that there was something wrong with him and that his appearance was something to be ashamed of, despite his parents' efforts to convince him otherwise.

When he had first arrived at the Institute, the Professor had taken her and Scott aside and explained to them that Kurt had had a difficult past, and a recent traumatic experience had left him badly shaken. He didn't elaborate what that experience had been. He did say that Kurt might find it easier to talk to her and Scott since they were closer to his own age. She found herself comforting him regularly after the first time that she had woken him from a bad nightmare. What she never told him was that she had seen his nightmares, wanting him to tell her if and when he wanted to. But what she had seen horrified her, and she had spent a few sleepless nights over it herself. As yet unexposed to humanity at its worst, she had found it difficult to believe that any civilized society in this day and age could condone something like this. She had come to think of him as a little brother that she had always wanted as a child. He warmed her heart and made her laugh, and acted as a perfect counter balance to Scott's serious demeanor and she had enjoyed having someone who looked up to her.

Kurt's rant reached a fevered pitch. Jean made no move to protest or cut him off with reassurances. Everything that Kurt had been forcing down for months was finally bursting free. It was best to let it all out. He would feel better once he was done. Then the therapy could begin. At this moment he did not require a counselor. He simply needed someone to listen.

So she listened. After a while his rant began losing steam, and finally tapered off and stopped. She put an arm around him and gently pulled him closer to lean on her. The tension rapidly drained out of his muscles as he slumped against her as if no longer able to support his own weight. She ran her fingers lightly through his hair in a way that she could sense he found soothing, a simple gesture that conveyed more than words ever could. She could feel his breathing and heartbeat slowing down and returning to normal.

"All right. Did you consider that maybe she likes you because you are funny, and handsome, and kind, and wonderful?"

Kurt sighed and gestured toward his own face. "Is zis your idea of good looking?"

"Of course. I think you're cute." Jean said impishly. "Trust me Kurt, that chick digs the fuzzy dude. It doesn't take a telepath to see that. She's the real thing. I'd snap her up if I were you. You won't find another like her."

"_Mein Gott_, Jean, do you have any idea how much harassment she's facing because of me?" Kurt said wearily. "She parks her car a couple of blocks from ze school because it got vandalized twice. First time someone scratched 'mutie lover' over zhe windshield. Second time zey slashed zhe tyres. Both times Scott and I fixed it here in zhe garage. Her books were stolen from her locker. Not to mention what everyone is saying to her face and behind her back."

"No Kurt." Jean said firmly. "It is not because of you. It is someone else's fault, not yours. Never blame yourself for what those jerks do."

"Fact remains zhat she's suffering for no fault of hers." Kurt said heavily. "And what is she getting in return?"

"You." Jean said simply. "She's getting you in return, and to her that more than makes up for what the world has to throw at her."

Kurt shook her head. "I am not worth zat much."

"Kurt, how can you say that?" Jean chided him. "Do you have any idea how much you mean to us?"

"Even after I left you in zhe lurch?" he muttered lowering his head.

"Huh? What're you talking aba..." Jean began, when she suddenly remembered the incident, when Duncan and his two cronies had pushed Scott around after they had been exposed as mutants, and Kurt had been reluctant to step in. "Oh that." she said dismissively. "That was a long time ago. Don't tell me you're still beating yourself up over it." His refusal to meet her eyes confirmed that.

"Kurt…" she began. When he still didn't look at her, she put her fingers under his chin and tilted his face up, forcing him to meet her gaze. "Kurt, that's done with. Forget it."

He gaped at her. "How can you not be mad at me after something like zat?"

"We don't hold grudges against our own friends Kurt, Professor Xavier taught us better than that." Jean said gently. "You were afraid. We can understand. And after what you have been through, it's quite understandable that public scrutiny is much more unnerving for you than it is for us. I know the effect of terror better than most. That particular incident just got you in the chink in your armor. We all have them. We all have our moments of weakness. It's a part of what makes us human." When Kurt still looked doubtful, she said, "Let me tell you a personal secret." Lowering her voice, she continued, "For a time, I actually thought Duncan was the one."

"Zhe one? Zhe one who what? Oh." Kurt froze wide eyed as the meaning of the phrase 'the one' became clear to him. The empty soda bottle slipped out of his slack, nerveless grasp and rolled towards the edge of the roof as he looked at Jean in disbelief. Jean stopped its motion and brought it soaring back into her hands with a flick of her fingers, giggling embarrassedly at the dumbfounded expression on Kurt's face.

"See? If a superior intellect such as mine can make such an obvious error where relationships are concerned, who can blame ordinary mortals such as yourself?" She said with faux haughtiness. Giving him a mock glare, she warned playfully, "Of course, if you ever _breathe_ a word about this to anyone, I'll deny it. While _you_ will find yourself getting nauseous at the sight of food for a week." In a softer and more serious voice , she added, "What are friends for, if not to forgive? It happens, Kurt. People do stupid things from time to time. And they learn from their mistakes."

"But zat is no excuse for abandoning your friends." Kurt said in a low voice, his head dropping again. Jean tilted it back up.

"Kurt, it's done with." She said gently. "We've all forgotten that incident. And we'll never remember it again. All that matters to us is that you came back."

Kurt felt lighter, like a load had been unstrapped from his back. He had been guilt ridden over that particular incident for a long time. He looked at Jean gratefully, unable to find words to thank her. But she understood.

"Come on." she said brightly. "Let's go flying."

"In zhe jet?"

"No" she laughed. "I have my own ride. It's a lot slower than the jet, but it gives a great view." She placed her hand on his shoulder. Kurt gave a yelp as a sudden weightlessness gripped him, and the Institute roof fell away sharply. Jean gripped is shoulder reassuringly. "Don't worry Kurt, I won't let you fall." The warmth in her voice told Kurt that she meant it more than the literal sense, and he was grateful.

They rose high above the institute. Kurt drew in a breath. "You vere right. Zhe view is incredible." The lights of Bayville lay spread before them. Kurt had been at much higher altitudes in the jet. But the experience of flying unsupported this high was something else.

"Yep" Jean agreed. "Humbling isn't it?" She turned to look at him curiously. "Something's still bothering you. What is it?"

Kurt hesitated before speaking in a rush. "If I go deep into zis relationship, and if it doesn't vork out, zen what?"

Jean understood. "You're wondering if it's better not to have loved at all than to have loved and lost."

"I don't know." Kurt mumbled.

Jean was silent for a few seconds before speaking. "Let me tell you about this friend of mine. She writes really great stories. There's this one story that she's always wanted to write, more than anything else. She thinks about it all the time. Her masterpiece. But she's afraid that it'll be a flop. So she refuses to write her story until she's sure that it'll be well received."

Kurt frowned. "Zat's silly. How will she know if her story will be a success if she never gets around to writing it?"

"Exactly" Jean said smiling like a Cheshire cat and Kurt realized that she had tricked him into saying the very thing that she was trying to convince him of. "_Write your story Kurt_. It's the only way you'll know for sure. If it doesn't work out, you'll at least know that you tried. But you don't want to be looking back on your life fifty years from now and wondering how differently it would have gone if you had only been a little braver."

She watched as the meaning of her words sank in and realization dawned on his furry face. She left him to think about what she had said as they gazed over the lights of Bayville in companionable silence.

At length she tugged on his arm. "Come on, let's go back. Scott will be wondering where I've gone and the party won't be complete without you."

Kurt came out of his reverie. "Vait. I vant a picture." He gingerly pulled out his digicam from his pocket. Forge had modified it for greater picture definition and clarity, enhanced nightvision and a holographic display. He adjusted the settings and set the timer. Jean telekinetically held at a distance. Both of them put an arm around each other's shoulders and grinned as the camera clicked. It was a spectacular shot when they checked it on the camera's holographic display – the two of them floating unsupported against the backdrop of the institute, with the lights of the party in the distance.

"Zhe angel and zhe devil." Kurt proclaimed holding up the camera.

"Flatterer" Jean teased. "Come on, let's go."

Kurt put away his camera and, on an impulse, reached out to envelope her in a hug. "Zhank you big sister." He said, his voice slightly muffled in her shoulder "For everyzing."

Jean was both surprised and touched. Wrapping her arms around him she returned the hug, resting her cheek on the top of his head. "Anytime little brother." she said warmly. "Anytime."

They disengaged and Kurt teleported them over to the party. Not surprisingly, the location he had chosen was right next to the buffet table. Jean watched in amused disbelief as he grabbed a plate and loaded it with everything it could hold. She had always been envious of his ability to eat all he wanted without worrying about his weight.

"Jean." Someone called from behind her. She turned to see Scott making his way to her through the crowd. "Where did you go? I was looking for you."

Jean jerked a thumb over her shoulder. "Having a serious talk with the elf. He needed some relationship advice."

Scott looked over to where she was pointing. "Is everything all right between him and Amanda?"

"There are still a few things he needs to figure out" she said, and smiled as they watched him regale Kitty and Amara with one of his tall tales. "But I think he's better now."

** ========== XxX ========== **

**Reviews please. The more people review, positively or negatively, the more I will be encouraged to update faster.**

**Feel free to point out any flaws in my writing, however minute, along with suggestions for improvement.**

**I may have altered the timeline slightly to fit the story. Please bear with me on that one.**


	2. Rogue

**Aaaand I'm back.**

**Really, really sorry it took me so many months to get it online, but it has really been a crazy year.**

**A/N :- This chapter takes place several years after the previous one. And I have made several changes to the canon.**

**In the canon, Jimaine and Amanda are the same people. Here I have made them into two separate characters.**

**Jimaine and Stefan are Kurt's maternal cousins, instead of adoptive siblings like in the canon. I also invented a maternal Aunt and Uncle for Kurt. Both of whom are OCs.**

**I don't remember if Kurt's adoptive parents' first names were ever revealed. So I decided to name them myself.**

**This story originated as a oneshot Kurt-Rogue sibling fic that had half formed in my head. But Amanda formed such a major character that I reworked it and posted it here. Hope you like it.**

**Many thanks to all the people who took the time to review. Special thanks to Caprichoso for the corrections. You guys rock.**

**Made some minor changes to the first chapter, in case anyone wants to check. Refined it a bit. Let me know what you think.**

** ========== XxX ========== **

Rogue picked up a handful of glittering powdery snow in her gloved hand and gently closed her fist, allowing the snow to pour out from between her fingers. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath of the crisp refreshing mountain air and opened her eyes again to find herself looking at a clear cloudless sky. The valley, carpeted in snow, made for a breathtaking view, like a picture perfect postcard. It promised to be a white Christmas.

_If Rahne could see this she'd never come inside the house. _Rahne Sinclair, the mansion's resident werewolf, had taken up photography as a hobby.

Rogue gazed out over the snow covered valley and the magnificent view it presented. The sight of it never failed to take her breath away, a landscape so mind-blowing that no painting, no photograph, could do it justice. Kurt's native village Winzeldorf, situated in the heart of the Black Forest, was beautiful in the winter.

Rogue had fallen in love with it ever since the first time he had brought her home with him for Christmas, so many years ago. Ever since then she had accompanied him to Germany every year for Christmas. His parents had only been too happy to make room for her in their home and their lives. By her second visit she had started calling them Uncle Hans and Aunt Heidi, deciding that Herr and Frau Wagner was far too formal. For a person whose idea of being social was being moody, sarcastic and keeping people at an arm's length, the gesture was tantamount to the act of breaking down the Berlin wall.

At the end of her third visit, she simply left stashed away a duffel bag containing most of the clothing that she had packed for the trip into the Wagners' attic so that she wouldn't have to carry as much during her next visit.

By her fourth visit she had a closet all to herself.

By her fifth visit, the Wagners had started referring to the small guest room where Rogue slept when she was visiting as 'Anna-Marie's room', even when she wasn't there. (Kurt's mother refused to refer to Rogue by her nickname, insisting that 'Anna-Marie' was a much nicer name for a girl than 'Rogue', though Rogue rarely used her birth name any more.)

Which led to this moment.

Rogue moodily blew a few strands of her hair off her face. Much as she loved her yearly visits here, this year's trip left much to be desired. And she could hear the cause of it coming up behind her, her boots crunching in the ice.

"Hey Rogue." The Cause chirped as she drew level.

"Hey Amanda." Rogue replied tonelessly. _Jeez, is it too much to ask for a little solitude around here?_

"What're you doing out here?" Amanda asked in an attempt to make conversation. She didn't seem to get the hint that her company wasn't wanted at the moment.

"Just takin' in the view." Rogue replied shortly. _What do Ah_ look_ like Ah'm doin' out here, searching for Bigfoot?_ Rogue knew that she was coming across as brusque, but she couldn't bring herself to care at the moment. Petty as it may seem, Amanda wasn't her favorite person right now.

"So you're looking forward to the sightseeing trip?" Amanda continued, apparently not to be deterred easily.

"Ah guess." _Does she ever stop talking?_ Rogue wondered grumpily. She knew that if she turned to look at Amanda, her face would be a nauseating shade of perky, a la Kitty Pryde. She did, and it was.

Apparently some of Rogue's frustration and irritation must have shown on her face as well, as Amanda leaned slightly away from her. "Kurt's mother is getting breakfast ready." She said, sounding slightly nervous. "She told me to come and get you."

"In a moment." Rogue said, turning back to the scenery. Amanda seemed to have recognized the dismissal for what it was, as she turned around and walked back to the house without a word. Rogue listened to the crunch of the ice beneath her boots fade away into the distance, feeling a slight guilt settle into her stomach. She hadn't meant to sound so snippy. It was nothing personal. She liked Amanda enough, as much as Rogue could be said to _like_ any one. Amanda had fallen for Kurt despite his appearance, had spoken out in his defense against bigoted teachers, racists, mutant haters and even her own parents, and had stuck with him regardless of the hardships and perils that accompanied. For her sheer persistence and dogged determination to maintain her relationship, she had won the other X-Men's approval. Of course this was Rogue's brother she was dating and in Rogue's book _no one_ was good enough for her brother, but Amanda was … acceptable.

The whole thing had turned south a few days earlier.

Amanda had wanted Kurt to spend Christmas with her but Kurt's parents (and Rogue) had protested. Kurt wanted Amanda to come with him and Rogue to Germany, but Amanda's parents had protested. That was when Amanda's mother had her brainwave. A whole family vacation in Germany, to Kurt's native village, which just conveniently happened to be a tourist spot.

Kurt's parents were delighted that they were finally going to get to meet the girl their Kurti couldn't stop talking about. Kurt was delighted to be able to spend Christmas with his family _and_ his girlfriend. Amanda's mother was delighted at the opportunity to revisit her roots. (Her parents had been Romani, though she had been born and brought up in the States.) Amanda's father was delighted to have his daughter… well not home, but he was glad to have her for Christmas.

Rogue was not remotely delighted.

Her mood had gone downhill from the moment they had boarded the jet. Flights over Christmas were booked months in advance, but there were always seats available in First Class. Rogue and Kurt both booked their tickets with a Bluestar Airlines Gold Card. One of the perks of being a senior X-Man (or X-Woman), courtesy of one Warren Worthington III. Amanda's parents talked quietly with each other throughout the trip. Amanda and Kurt talked as well, not so quietly. Rogue fumed.

If Rogue had been a little more honest with herself, she would have admitted that the reason she didn't want Amanda on the trip was because she looked forward to spending time with Kurt away from the mansion on these occasions. Rogue had always been a private person, uncomfortable around strangers and in crowds. Kurt, and by extension his parent were all she had that was just _hers_, the most significant part of her personal life, and the only one that was irreplaceable, treasured because it was untouched by the turbulence that was her life with the X-Men. To Rogue, Kurt wasn't a fellow teammate. He was her brother. That was how she thought of him and referred to him. Growing up lonely and misunderstood, the brother-sister relation she shared with Kurt and the time they spent together meant more to her than even she realized, or was willing to admit. She wasn't ready to share her brother with Amanda just yet, not as a family. Dating was one thing. Bringing your girlfriend home was a pretty big line to cross.

But Rogue could think of no way to tell that to Kurt without sounding clingy. So she dealt with it in typical Rogue fashion. She clammed up. And stewed. Now it was the second day of their visit, and her mood still hadn't improved. The fact that Amanda was rooming with her for the duration of the trip wasn't helping matters.

_Oh well_, she sighed. _Time for breakfast._

** ========== X ========== **

Breakfast was a livelier than usual. Kurt's maternal aunt Traudl and her husband Rolf had dropped in, along with their teenaged children Stefan and Jimaine. Now Stefan had cornered Kurt and was busy extracting all the details. Jimaine and Amanda were giggling like mad over something. Rogue ate silently. It was as she was rifling through her closet later, trying do decide on an outfit that the familiar strong smell of perfume reached her.

"Hey Jimaine." She said without turning around.

Kurt's cousin Jimaine huffed as she sat on the bed. "It really creeps me out vhen you do that." She complained. "How did you _know_ it vas me? I vasn't even making any sound."

Rogue wrinkled her nose. "Ah could smell that perfume of yours. Did you use the entire bottle?"

Jimaine sniffed experimentally. "Doesn't smell too strong to me. You must be having a rather sensitive nose. Anyway, vhat's up with you?"

"Same old." Rogue shrugged. "College is a real pain in the…"

"I vasn't referring to that." Jimaine interrupted, fixing her a look. "You've been moody all morning. Vhat iz the matter?"

Rogue snorted and went back to browsing her closet. "News flash, Jimaine, Ah'm _always_ moody."

Jimaine watched her silently for a couple of minutes. At last she said, "Is it about Amanda?"

Rogue froze. Turning around, she glared at Jimaine. "What gives you that idea?" she demanded.

Jimaine returned her look without flinching. "Vell, your reaction for one." She said evenly. "And the fact that you barely said a word to her throughout breakfast. _And_ the expression on your face vhenever she spoke to you. She may not have noticed, but I did."

Rogue turned away without a word, but Jimaine wasn't going to let it slide. "Vhat iz the matter? You don't like her?"

Rogue sighed and turned away from her closet, resigning herself to the inevitability of the conversation. "It's not as if Ah _dis_like her." She said, slowly running her fingers through her hair. She walked over and sat next to Jimaine on the bed. In a low voice she continued, "Don't tell anyone Ah said this, but to tell the truth, Ah'm not really burstin' with joy ta' have her here." She had no idea why she was spilling all this to Jimaine. They were friendly, but it wasn't as if being related to Kurt had made them especially close or anything. But she had a feeling that Jimaine wouldn't judge her, and that she could be trusted to keep a personal matter confidential. God knew she had to tell _someone_.

Damn that furball, for making her vulnerable like this, for his determination to break down the shell she had spent years constructing around herself, for making her unable to forcibly bury her insecurities under a layer of attitude as she had once been wont to, for making her face up and deal with things she would have preferred to ignore and sweep under the proverbial rug.

Jimaine cocked her head as she regarded Rogue, as if she was a puzzle Jimaine was trying to solve. At last she said, "Why not? She seems to be a nice enough person."

Rogue threw up her hands. "Jimaine, Ah come here to get _away_ from anything related to the X-Men…"

"And now it feels as if a piece of that life has followed you here, to your sanctuary." Jimaine finished, nodding her head in understanding. "But Rogue, she's Kurt's girlfriend, and the rate they are going, she is going to be your sister-in-law. She vill be part of _both_ of your worlds. You should try to get used to it."

Rogue huffed and flopped back on the bed. "Tell me about it." She snorted at the ceiling. "Seriously, those two are attached at the hip most of the time. Is too much for me to ask that Ah get ta' spend _some_ time with mah brothah? Ah thought Christmas was about _family_." Even as she finished the sentence, she was struck with the realization that she had referred to Kurt _and_ his parents as her family, and even as the thought flashed through her mind, she knew that it was true. Kurt's parents were the closest she had ever had to her own. Irene's lies and betrayal had long destroyed any kinship Rogue felt for her former guardian. Having absorbed Mystique's memories, Rogue knew now that Mystique had specifically picked her out from all the other children at the orphanage on Irene's recommendation, for the power that Irene foresaw she would have. When Mystique had no longer been able to keep an eye on her, Irene took her in, for the sole purpose of securing her allegiance and raising her into a weapon. _Mystique's_ weapon. And it had almost worked. Almost.

And this place, filled with brightness, warmth and laughter, among people who had offered to share everything with her and asked for nothing in return, this place felt like home in a way that Irene's dark, silent and gloomy house never had.

Jimaine looked closely at her. "Sounds to me like you are jealous." She remarked.

Rogue sat bolt upright. "_Jealous_" she said scathingly. "Just why should Ah be _jealous_?"

Jimaine just looked at her.

"Ah mean _really_."

Jimaine drummed her fingers against the side of the bed.

"All right." Rogue admitted, flopping back again. "Maybe Ah am just a _little_ bit jealous. Ah just miss spending time with him. Now he spends every spare moment he has with her. Ah haven't had any time with him lately." She massaged her forehead. "Gawd, that sounded really pathetic." But it was true. With Kitty occupied with her boyfriend, and Kurt spending nearly all his time with his girlfriend, Rogue could feel the familiar pangs of loneliness creeping back into her. Especially since her own relationship with a red eyed Cajun swamp rat seemed to be going nowhere. And 'going nowhere' meant that she had seen neither hide nor hair from him for months.

"No, not really." Jimaine said, lying back and gazing thoughtfully at the ceiling. "I remember when Stefan started dating, and used to spend so much time with his girlfriend. I used to feel a bit jealous."

"Oh, really?" Rogue asked, turning to look at her.

Jimaine nodded, without taking her eyes off the ceiling. "Stefan and I are twins you know. Ve were both best friends growing up. Ve never had any secrets from each other, and neither of us ever accepted anything that ve couldn't share with the other. And then Stefan got himself a girlfriend, and everything changed. He had a whole different schedule and activities that didn't involve me, and he vas spending _so much_ time with her. They became inseparable and I rarely got to spend time alone with my brother anymore. She vas all he could talk about and I resented her because he told her things that he vasn't telling me, and now his life vas heading in a direction that I could not follow." She fell silent.

After a moment, Rogue asked, "So, what did you do?"

Jimaine shrugged. "I got myself a boyfriend soon after. It made me appreciate everything he had been going through, and it made _him_ appreciate everything _I_ had been feeling, and ve sat down and talked. Things just shook themselves out. Ve don't get to spend as much time together as ve used to, but ve are just as close as ve vere."

Rogue snorted, thinking about her own _boyfriend_. "The boyfriend route won't work for me. Any other ideas?"

Jimaine propped her head on one hand and looked at Rogue contemplatively. "Vell, if you can't hang out with just your brother, hang out with zhem _both_." She suggested. "Go for an occasional movie, shopping, hang out in a mall with other common friends, that kind of thing. I mean zose two can't be hanging out alone _all zhe time_, without interaction with anyone else. It's impossible. Just because zhe two of zhem are a tight couple now, it doesn't mean zhat zhey no longer need zhe company of zheir friends and families. Besides, Amanda vill probably like it if you hung out with them. Might make her feel zhat she is accepted in your circles. If you keep trying to spend time with Kurt by excluding her, she vould probably feel as if you are deliberately snubbing her, as if she's not welcome into zhe family."

Rogue sighed. "Ah guess you're right." She said, tracing a worn patch on the bedspread with her fingers. "He really is the best thing that ever happened to me and Ah'd hate to lose him. But things change with time Ah suppose. He's got his life, Ah got mahne." It was inevitable, now that she stopped to think about it. It happened, people grew up, siblings and childhood friends went their separate ways and got on with their own lives, old friends grew distant and found new ones. It was all a part of growing up, she supposed. It didn't mean that she had to like it. Nobody did. But it happened to everybody and it was unavoidable. So she would just have to deal with it.

** ========== X ========== **

Kurt stood in the kitchen, separated from Rogue's room only by a single wall, only partly concentrating on the sandwiches he was making. He hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but people who wanted to have a private conversation in his vicinity often didn't put enough distance, forgetting that though his hearing was not as good as Logan's, it was still way above human level. He paused in his actions, gazing down at the sandwiches with unseeing eyes.

He knew that Jean had advised him to take things slow with Amanda, and not to rush things. He knew that Amanda's friends had been complaining for months about how she never had much time to hang around with them any more. But he had always assumed that it was a good natured grumbling. The nudge-nudge-wink-wink kind of joking. That they didn't really mean what they said.

Maybe they were being more serious than he had thought.

Kitty, he knew, was engrossed with her boyfriend and had her head in the clouds half the time. He himself was spending every moment he could spare with Amanda.

And apparently Rogue was feeling left out.

It had always been the three of them as a group at the Institute. Sure, they hung out a lot with other people a lot of the time, but with Kurt as Kitty's best friend, and Rogue as her room mate, and the strangely convoluted brother-sister relationship Kurt shared with Rogue, it had drawn them together into a trio of sorts.

Kurt shared a degree of closeness with all of his team mates in a manner that differed for each one of them. Scott was like a big brother, Jean was like a surrogate elder sister, Kitty was his female best friend, Evan was a fellow prankster and Rogue was his sister through their relation to a woman that neither wanted anything to do with. But he knew that if Rogue could be said to be close to anyone, it was just him, and Kitty to a lesser degree. He had always had a soft spot for Rogue. Maybe it was because she had never had a proper family. Maybe because she, like him, had a mutation which forced her to isolate herself from others. Or maybe it was simply because the two of them had a common bond linking them in different ways to a woman who, as far as they were concerned, wasn't related to either of them.

But despite all that, he had failed to notice the distance that had sprung up between them. And only now, when it had been brought to his attention, did he realize how much it bothered him.

He picked up the plate and carried it outside. His parents had arranged for a sightseeing trip and it seemed like a good opportunity to try and talk to Rogue.

** ========== X ========== **

However as afternoon approached, the mild headache that Rogue had woken up with had grown into a full blown headsplitter. Kurt's mother took one look into her bloodshot eyes and sent her straight to bed with medication and strict instructions to get full rest.

"How can you get sick?" Amanda asked as she watched Rogue gulp down the pills. "Wouldn't your body, like, drain the life force from any invading pathogens or something?"

"That's limited to mah skin." Rogue replied wincing as a wave of dizziness hit her. "Mah insides are the same as any othah person."

This raised the matter that someone needed to stay behind with Rogue. Kurt's mother had volunteered since she was staying behind anyway. The Wagners owned and operated an inn in the village and Christmas was peak business season, so they couldn't leave it unattended for long.

"No" Kurt cut into the discussion. "You go vith zhe others. I'll stay."

Amanda's face fell immediately. However Kurt leaned to her and said something in a low voice. She nodded doubtfully, looking slightly apprehensive. No one else heard what he had whispered, but it became clear that Kurt had his own reasons for staying behind.

Several hours later Kurt prowled along the corridors of the inn, checking in on the staff and guests. After saying goodbye to the rest of the group, he had brought Rogue to the inn and set up a bed for her in a spare room while he supervised the staff. It was getting close to lunchtime, and he decided to drop in on Rogue to see if she wanted any lunch. Rogue however was already awake, rubbing sleep out of her eyes.

"H-H-H-Hi." she said, trying and failing to stifle a yawn. "How long've Ah been asleep?"

"It's lunchtime."

Rogue sat bolt upright. "Oh gawd." She said, sounding mortified. "You should've woken me."

Kurt snorted. "You're on vacation, _mein schwester_. Zhat means total R and R. Especially if you are unwell. Just relax, vill ya? It's not as if you've got a training session scheduled." He paused. "Now that you're awake, do you want some lunch?"

"Ah could do with a bite." Rogue agreed as her stomach rumbled.

After lunch, both the siblings took a stroll along the banks of the stream that flowed near the Wagners' house. After an initial awkwardness at so much time spent apart, both of them fell back into a natural routine.

"Ah missed this." Rogue said during a pause.

Kurt hesitated for a moment. "I missed this too." He admitted finally. He had forgotten how much he liked spending time with his friends and his sister. With his all consuming focus on his love life he really had been neglecting all the other people in his life. The conversation he had overheard that morning kept flashing through his mind and he wondered whether he should broach that subject. Instead he opted to raise another topic. There was no need to cause Rogue further embarrassment by revealing that he had overheard what was supposed to be a private conversation.

"Amanda thinks zhat you've taken a dislike to her for some reason." He said casually. Rogue stiffened. It seemed Amanda _had_ noticed. And if she and Jimaine _both_ had noticed, it was possible that others had as well. Amanda's parents didn't know her that well. They might not have picked up on her moodiness. _Kurt's_ parents on the other hand were a different matter.

"Why would she think that?" she said, in what was supposed to be a flippant manner, but the inflection in her voice gave her away.

"She says you've been snippy ever since we arrived and she's worried zhat you don't really want her here." Kurt continued.

Rogue looked away, a guilty feeling starting to gnaw at her. Whatever her personal feelings on the matter, she hadn't meant to spoil Amanda's vacation.

_Well in that case, maybe you should give some consideration to other people's feelings for a change, _a sarcastic voice spoke in the back of her mind_. You could start by pulling your head outta your ass._

"It's…it's nothing." She said at last.

Kurt sighed and stopped. "Rogue," he said gently, grasping her shoulders with his three fingered hands. "Is something bothering you? Something you need to tell me?"

Rogue stared at her shoes for a moment and then lifted her eyes to meet his. "No, it's nothing… nothing at all." It was true. This wasn't something she needed to resolve with Kurt. It was something she needed to resolve with Amanda. And now, looking at it through the perspective Jimaine had given her, it felt like such a trivial matter.

"Because, I know I haven't had much time for my friends lately and I am really sorry about that. I promise I'll try to …"

"It's okay, little brothah." she said, and hugged him on an impulse, in a rather un-Rougelike fashion. It felt strange to call him 'little brother' anymore. He was now taller than her. "Ah did miss hanging out with you though." She admitted.

"Is zhat what was bothering you? Zhat we wouldn't be a part of each other's lives anymore, now that I have a girlfriend?"

"Something like that. Yeah." Rogue admitted shamefacedly.

She felt him wrap his arms around her and press a light kiss on her hair. "No such luck, mein schwester. I am not so easy to get rid of." He joked lightheartedly. He pulled back slightly to look Rogue in the eyes and said softly, "You won't lose me, not in any way that matters. Whatever happens, I will never be further than a phone call away."

"Yes" Rogue smiled. "I know."

** ========== X ========== **

Later in the evening, the rest of the group returned, laden with the fruits of a day well spent sightseeing and shopping. Rogue mostly just listened quietly, as she helped Kurt's mother sort out the packages.

"You seem to be looking better." Kurt's mother remarked, examining Rogue critically. She wrapped her hand in a thin cloth and pressed the back of her hand experimentally against Rogue's throat and forehead.

"Well, zhe fever seems to haff gone." She said. "But you should take it easy, just in case."

Rogue smiled slightly. "It's all right, Aunt Heidi." she said. "I feel much better now."

** ========== X ========== **

After dinner, Rogue and Amanda volunteered to do the dishes, not an especially tedious task, since most of it was done by the dishwasher. An initial attempt at conversation while they waited for the dishwasher to finish its cycle faltered and petered out into an awkward silence. Amanda knew that Rogue hadn't been thrilled by her presence on this trip. And Rogue knew that Amanda knew. And now Amanda knew that Rogue knew that she knew. There was no point in pretending anymore, which led them to this impasse.

"Rogue," Amanda said tentatively without taking her eyes off the cup that she was rinsing, apparently deciding to address the elephant in the room, "I've got the feeling that you've taken a sudden dislike to me for some reason, though I don't know what I did to make you mad at me…"

Well, of course she wouldn't, Rogue thought tiredly. Rogue had gone from getting along well enough with Amanda to not getting along at all overnight. There was no reason for the poor girl to have been privy to the cause of it.

"You didn't do anything." Rogue muttered, wishing that she was anywhere but here. But she had brought this upon herself and she would have to apologize and there was no avoiding it.

"Then why…"

"It was just me being an idiot, that's all." Rogue said. "Ah'm sorry." She added with some slight difficulty. Her eyes fell on Amanda's wrist, and the words froze in her throat, the bracelet on her arm had looked familiar to her, and now suddenly she remembered where she had seen it before. She grabbed Amanda's arm and held it closer. Sure enough, the symbols on the bracelet were the exact same ones that she had seen tattooed on Mesmero's arm.

"Where'd you get this bracelet?" Rogue demanded.

"It's a family heirloom." Amanda replied looking startled. "Why? What's wrong with…"

"_Family heirloom?"_

"Yeah. My mother's parents are Romani." Amanda said, looking mystified. "They were from these parts actually." She looked down at the bracelet on her wrist. "This bracelet was handed down from grandfather to grandson for generations. That ended with my mother. She was an only child, so the family name ended with her." She paused. "This bracelet was supposed to have been my brother's, but after he…" The words seemed to stick in her throat. She took a deep breath and finished, "…but my grandfather gave it to me instead."

_Romani. Gypsies. Of course. _Rogue mused. Gypsies were traditionally traveling performers. Carnivals were something of a family business for them. Mesmero was probably at least half gypsy himself. Probably a descendant of the same tribe that Amanda's grandparents had belonged to, it the tattoo was any indication. That was when the latter half of what Amanda had said registered in her mind.

"Your brother?" Rogue asked. "Ah didn't know you have a brother."

"I _had_ a brother." Amanda's voice shook slightly. "He died when I was fourteen." The last part came out in a whisper.

Rogue sucked in a breath. "Oh." She said weakly. "Ah…Ah'm sorry."

Amanda nodded in response, though she didn't really seem to have registered what Rogue had said. Her eyes were unfocused, locked in a thousand yard stare, the words flowing out her, almost trancelike, as she recounted the events of that fateful day, so many years ago, seared sharply into her memory.

_It was a week after her fourteenth birthday. Her parents were out of town visiting friends and she was on babysitting duty. Her mother had left her with explicit instructions which were promptly forgotten as soon as she got to the phone. At five in the evening on the dot Nicu, her brother, pulled her out of the juiciest gossip about who was saying what about whom and who had a crush on whom and what they were going to do about it, with his incessant demand that she accompany him for his daily trip to the nearby park, since neither of their parents were around to do it. She acquiesced. Grudgingly._

_On the way back, she ran into a friend and resumed her earlier interrupted conversation, unaware that her brother had wandered further away than she had realized. A screech of tires made her look up and what she saw made her heart stop. A black SUV was barreling across the road, cutting into the wrong lane, and heading straight for Nicu, who was busy looking at a litter of puppies on the side of the road, completely unaware of the approaching danger. Time slowed down. She screamed his name, but she didn't hear her own voice. She _felt_ it rip out of her throat, to be snatched away by the wind. Her brother looked up. She gestured wildly at him, to move out of the way but he just stared at her uncomprehendingly. An adult would have seen the panic on her face and heard the approaching vehicle and maybe would have reacted fast enough to dive to the safety of the trees on the side of the road. Afterwards there might have been skinned palms and maybe a sprained wrist but, with luck, there would have been survival._

_But Nicu was only twelve. He just stood there looking puzzled. She started toward him, but she already knew that it was futile. She would never get to him in time. In the final moments of his life, Nicu sensed his looming death and turned around to see the car an instant before it hit him. Almost as if in slow motion, Amanda saw her brother's body being thrown up into the air like a rag doll and land in a broken, bloody heap on the side of the road, the sight of which would remain seared into her mind to her dying day._

There was a tense silence in the kitchen as Amanda stopped. Finally Rogue ventured, "The driver. Did they find him?"

"Yeah, they found him. Or rather _them_." Amanda replied. "There were three punks in the car. The creeps had hotwired it and taken it out for a joyride. At first they tried to pass off the whole thing as an accident. As if anybody was going to buy _that_ story. They hit my brother like he had a bulls-eye painted on his back." She broke off and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before steadying herself and continuing, "The guy in the backseat was underage, and the first on to break. He told the cops that the punk in the passenger seat had bet ten points with the driver if he could hit my brother. Those were his exact words, _"Ten points if you can knock the chocolate out of that kid."_ That was what they decided my brother's life was worth. _Ten points._" She stopped. "So, yeah. I know what it's like to be victimized just because someone doesn't like the way you look." There was a pin drop silence in the kitchen. Even the howling wind had fallen silent. "I always wondered if he would have lived if I had done something differently, if maybe…"

"I keep telling her zhat it's not her fault, but she won't listen." Kurt spoke up from the doorway. Rogue jumped. Amanda seemed to be too preoccupied to be startled.

"I'm not so sure." Amanda muttered. "Isaw the car coming. If I had kept him close to me like I should have, maybe I could've pulled him out of the way in time."

"Number one, it's easy to be wise after the event." Kurt said raising one finger. Rogue got the impression that they had had this conversation before. "Number two, you can't keep a twelve year old tied to your apron strings all the time. Number three, you _might_ have been able to get to safety on your own, but it is unlikely zhat you could have gotten very far dragging Nicu with you. The car would likely have hit you _both_."

"But there was a chance that we could have made it right?" Amanda continued, still in a low voice, her eyes fixed on the bracelet.

"You don't know zhat." Kurt said quietly, walking over and putting an arm around her. It was a perfectly normal gesture, but somehow it seemed more intimate than any other time that Rogue had seen it. She moved away discreetly, feeling as if she was intruding into something private.

"No, I don't _know._" Amanda sighed leaning against his chest. "But I'll always wonder."

** ========== X ========== **

Kurt sat alone on the sofa in the living room, a cup of hot chocolate balanced in his three fingered hands. The fire in the hearth was starting burn low, casting a low ambience in the room, which suited his mood. The rest of the house was dark and silent. It seemed that he was the only one who didn't have the sense to be asleep in a warm, comfortable bed at 2 A.M on a cold and snowy winter night. As if to contradict that thought, footsteps sounded somewhere in the house, in the vicinity of the girls' room, heading towards the kitchen before venturing towards the living room, gradually slowing down and stopping behind him.

"Kurt?" came a voice from behind him.

"Rogue." He said, turning around to look at her. "Vhat are you doing still awake?"

"Same as you Ah suppose. Couldn't sleep." She hesitated. "D'you want to be, I dunno, alone or something right now?"

"No, stay." Kurt said, patting the seat next to him. "Your company is always welcome."

Rogue came around the sofa and sat down next to him, sipping from her own cup. After a few seconds of quiet she spoke up, "Care to share what's eating you?"

"Hmm?"

"You've been preoccupied all evening." Rogue said, swirling the hot chocolate in her cup. "You have no ahdea how_…odd…_it is to see you so quiet. You never shut up usually. So," she turned around to face him, "what's bothering you?" She hoped it had nothing to do with her and Amanda.

Kurt was silent for several seconds. Rogue was starting to think that he wasn't going to answer when he spoke up suddenly, "Am I doing the right thing by involving Amanda in my life, in my _world_?"

Rogue raised an eyebrow. "Care to elaborate?"

"It's something Tabitha said to me a couple of months ago, zhat a 'normie' could never live for long in our world, the way things are right now. And it doesn't look like its going to change anytime in the foreseeable future. She said coexisting was difficult enough right now, cohabitation was just about impossible and zhat relationships like zhat are doomed from the start. Zhat sooner or later, the 'normie' would crack under the pressure and throw in the towel. And maybe she was right. I mean, look at Bobby, estranged from his parents, not because, zhey had a problem with him being a mutant, but because zhey couldn't cope with the hardships of having a son who was a known mutant."

Rogue made a mental note to track Tabitha down at the first opportunity she got and to give her a piece of her mind. "You're putting stock in what Tabitha says, over what Amanda says?" she inquired, putting down her cup. "I mean, Tabby isn't a bad sort, but I wouldn't trust her judgment on, well, just about anything."

"But she was right about one thing." Kurt said, still staring at the fire. "Mandy would not be a part of this conflict if not for me. She can make a successful career in any field she wants. She could have a perfect life. Can I really just stand by and watch her throw all that away, just for me? What if she regrets it later? Could I live with myself, knowing zhat she is facing hardships zhat aren't hers to bear, all for my sake?

"Abraham Lincoln was a successful lawyer and politician. He spoke up against racial discrimination even though he wasn't suffering because of it. He became president and went to war over what he believed in. And he was arguably the greatest president in American history." Rogue pointed out. "Mother Teresa gave up her own comfortable life to help people in third world countries. Tony Stark is a multibillionaire playboy. Yet he puts his neck on the line to help people he has never met before and never will again, to resolve crises that have nothing to do with him or his company. And he's been known to openly defy the government to do what he believes is the right thing. And for that, foreign governments sometimes specifically request him to act as a mediator when dealing with the U.S. government." She paused. "The list goes on and on. All these people, they didn't do what they did to better their own lives, or because they were affected in any way, or because they were getting anything in return. They had no personal stakes in the success of their efforts. They were perfectly within their rights to turn their backs and go about their own business like the rest of the world. But they didn't. They _couldn't._"

Rogue paused again and said in a softer voice. "This isn't _just_ for you, though you _are_ the reason she got involved. She's in this 'cause she knows that she's standing for something bigger than her own comfort and stability. Chances are, if she'd never met you, she would've found another cause to involve herself in." She took his hand in her own. "It is _her_ life, Kurt. And it's her choice whether she wants to stay or quit. You need to respect that. People like her just can't turn a blind eye and walk away. And those are always the best kind of people."

There was a short pause. Then Kurt spoke up, "Well, you do present a convincing argument." Then in a teasing voice he added. "Since when did _you_ become so eloquent?"

"Hey, just 'cause Ah don't like to use big sentences, doesn't mean that Ah _can't_." Rogue protested mildly, finishing with a huge yawn. "As for the _eloquence_ as you put it, well, there's this brother of mahne who's got a way with words. Usually he just uses it to talk himself outta trouble. But once in a while he'll surprise ya with something really serious. Makes me think that maybe he's not as dense as he pretends to be." She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder as her eyelids began to droop. "He can be a real pest y'know? But that's okay. Ah love the goofball. Ah like him just as he is, fur shedding, annoying jackass and all. And Ah wouldn't want him any different."

Kurt was warmed by her gesture of unwavering solidarity. Taking her gloved hand in his own, he said in a low voice, "Thank you, Rogue…Rogue?" He was answered by a soft snore. Rogue was already fast asleep.

"Come on Rogue, let's get you back to bed." He said in a low voice, patting her cheek softly. Rogue just mumbled incoherently and shifted slightly closer, adjusting her head into a more comfortable position. Kurt shook his head and set down his mug on the armrest. Careful not to jostle her head resting on his shoulder, he gently scooped her up and walked on padded feet to her room. He carefully deposited her in her bed, pulled the covers over her and straightened, his eyes automatically seeking Amanda, as they often did, her silhouette visible in her own bed on the other side of the room. Turning back to Rogue, he brushed a stray lock of hair away from her face.

"Love you too, _mein schwester._" he said in a low voice, a smile flickering on his face. "And thank you…for being you."

Walking back to the door, he paused and looked back, sweeping his gaze over both his girls. In the instant before he teleported away, he thought he saw Rogue's lips curl into a small smile.

** ========== X ========== **

Amanda made her way to the edge of the crowd and stood wide eyed as the colorful parade marched past. "Wow" she said softly "They sure know how to celebrate around here."

Rogue chuckled. "The Rhineland Carnival." She said. "It's a good thing we came a few days early. Carnival spirit is temporarily suspended over Christmas and picks up again in the New Year." She glanced back to see Kurt making his way through, flanked by Jimaine and Stefan on either side.

"You like it?" Kurt asked Amanda, sliding an arm around her waist. She looked up at him, eyes shining.

"I love it." She breathed. "You were right. It's spectacular. Well worth the trip." She looked so beautiful, breathless and eyes shining. Kurt couldn't resist. He pulled her close, bent down and captured her lips, his free hand moving up her back, through her hair, to gently cradle her skull. It felt as natural as teleporting. He felt her melt against him, her arms wrapping around his neck. They were just starting to get involved when a loud and pointed throat clearing behind them suddenly made them remember that they had an audience. They broke apart to find the other three looking at them with a mixture of amusement and irritation. Amanda blushed and hastily tried to fix her hair. Kurt was examining an old beat up car as if he might never again see such a vehicle.

"Would you two mind doing that some other time? Like when the rest of us aren't around?" Rogue asked with a resigned sigh. Glancing around she said, "Ah want some photos to show the rest of the crowd when Ah get back. Ah don't doubt that Kurt's spent most of his memory card on Amanda. But let's get at least a few of the whole family, shall we?"

"Good idea." Amanda said hastily, still blushing. "Give me the camera. I'll take your picture."

"Don't be silly." Rogue said briskly. "When Ah said 'whole family', Ah meant you too." She handed her camera to a passer-by and positioned Amanda next to Kurt pretending not to notice the expression on her face, the initial surprised look giving way to relief and elation, having finally received acceptance from all of Kurt's friends and family.

As she took up position on Kurt's other side, she felt him put an arm around her shoulder and give her a small squeeze. She replied with a nudge. Afterward all five of them crowded around to view the photo. It was an impressive shot, despite the darkness, Kurt in the middle, with one arm around Amanda and the other around Rogue, with Stefan and Jimaine on either side. Amanda already looked as if she fit in perfectly. As if she had already belonged.

Rogue raised her eyes to meet Kurt and they shared a smile. And in that instant she knew that she would never have to worry about growing apart from him. Even if they grew up and had lives which took them in different directions, even if they were no longer closely involved in each other's lives, even if they no longer got to talk much, no matter the physical distance between them, be it miles or lightyears, they were and would always be brother and sister. and Kurt would always have a special place in her heart all to himself, just as she would in his.

And that was all that mattered.

** ========== XxX ========== **

**Finally, FINALLY, it's done. You have no idea how much hassle I had to go through to get it perfect. The second half alone took a considerable amount of whatever spare time I managed to wring for the past two months. But I couldn't upload it until I was satisfied with every phrase, nuance and expression. What can I say? I'm a perfectionist.**

**Please leave a review for my efforts. If my story was worth flagging for story-alerts, it has to be worth reviewing.**

**As before, feel free to point out any imperfections that may have slipped through, along with suggestions for improvement.**


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